Saturday 21 December 2019

Weather forecasters are cautiously forecasting. . . .


A White Christmas 




Below 500 - 1,000 meters above sea level where most people live  I doubt it. 

We've been having record breaking December temperatures. A few days ago the new all time December record temperature of 20.2 was announced. I'm glad Austria doesn't have temperatures as high as  those in Australia - 
47 C yesterday down under. 

Update: Australian all time temperature record broken in Nullabor (on south coast) 49.9 C 
Fasten your seat belts folks. No major rainfall expected for two months. 


White Christmas Day Weather Update: 
Definitely not white! 9 C, sunshine and showers, westerly breeze.

Tuesday 17 December 2019

Train Chaos 'Super Gau'


When they said they were going to build a new station - a so-called Hauptbahnhof - and reduce the number of trains arriving at other stations in particular the Westbahnhof  I said to Mrs G they shouldn't put all their eggs in one basket.

But they did,  and now it's the busiest time of the year for tourists and Christmas shoppers!

Due to a fire at the weekend on the main underground line the U1 the train travel situation has turned into chaos.

It will remain so for at least a week.

One comedian wrote a letter to the newspaper: This makes hardly any difference to the usual service.

The situation is that no trains can proceed from the Hauptbahnhof to the city centre U-hub at Karlsplatz or to Schwedenplatz a route used  by office workers and tourists. Another Hauptbahnhof drama to add to several scandals involving millions of euros that came to light during the construction of the Hauptbahnhof. The first drama was a winter of shivering in the open air on snow covered platforms due to the lack of waiting rooms for travelers.

I wouldn't be surprised if the Hauptbahnhof  is jinxed, despite the employment of an esoteric to cast a spell to keep away any evil spirits at a cost of somewhere in the region of €90,000.

Ironically in one corner of the double page spread about the latest chaos there is an advert from the association of Vienna's business and 'shopping street traders' featuring Herr Ludwig the  socialist mayor going about his Christmas shopping with a smile on his face and three happy companions aside a golden heart.

At the same time as the main artery of the railway infrastructure to the heart of the city has ground to a halt police have arrested men suspected of planning to carry out an attack on a Christmas market near one of the affected stations of Stephansplatz next to the city's cathedral.



Thursday 12 December 2019

Scotland the Brave


Guardian headline - Sturgeon has Voted                         


Click text for Sturgeon.

I must keep well in with the Scots.  I have outlaws in Wick.





*here is Austria we had a general election in September 2019 and the country is still bring run by a caretaker government appointed by the president following a political scandal - the news today is possibly a coalition government by the middle of January 2020 but don't bank on it :-) . . . these delays for wheeling and dealing behind closed doors are inevitable under a PR voting system.

Britain Goes to the Polls



It's a serious business and the country is deeply divided.

Here's the leading candidate on his way to the polling station.

A bit of humour on what is an important day for Britain (albeit from a defranchised Welshman with no dog in the fight).

Hope it goes well today in Blighty during this the season of goodwill. 




              I shall now make a pot of tea and take a look at  Rachel's view of the situation.
              Yesterday I watched a sky news video in which Farage hoped for enough BP
               seats to make a deal with the Tories.


Wednesday 11 December 2019

Coca Cola Cathedral




It's yet another Christmas Card!

Things go better with coke! And that includes Vienna's  Cathedral of St Stephen.

That's the moon up there in the sky.

Once upon a time someone at Coca Cola Inc. thought it would be a good idea to have the Coca Cola logo beamed onto the Lunar surface so that it would be visible from the Earth.

But that was beyond the pale.

Giant coke bottles illuminated by lights beamed onto the house of God at Christmas is small compensation.

Or is it?

Tuesday 10 December 2019

Creeping censorship


I experienced it again today.'

The blank screen.



It all started because I was reading a newspaper article about 34 women being killed by knives* in Austria so far this year.

In order to get more information I went to a news source which I use from time to time.  The story I found there was headlined German knife deaths rival London's (or words to that effect). I think I glimpsed that 5 people had died in 5 different German cities in knife attacks at the weekend. But I couldn't swear to it for suddenly -

as I was reading the article the computer screen started doing strange things and then a notice appeared on screen telling me I was 'forbidden to use this resource'.

Obviously a mistake I thought.

This is a news website in the public domain.

I've been using it for years.

But no, try as I might I cannot return to it.

A technical hitch or Big Brother censorship?

How can we know? We cannot know because today

as in 1984

too many people self censor - which does not bode well for our future.

When will we ever learn?


*now had an opportunity to reread the original newspaper article and it turns out they weren't all killed by knives  - other means included shooting, suffocating and strangulation.









Friday 6 December 2019

Christmas Books





At this time of year my mind turns to my poetry books. 

The latest addition to my collection is Tagore's Gitanjali
His verse somehow reminds me of the work of a favourite Welsh poet - R S Thomas. 

I feel the following from Gitanjali 30  could well have been written by Thomas: 

I came out alone on my way to my tryst. But who is this that follows me in the silent dark?
I move aside to avoid his presence but I escape him not. 
He makes the dust rise from the earth with his swagger; he adds his loud voice to every word that I utter.
He is my own little self . . .

I can imagine that Retired, here from Thomas's Collected Later Poems, might have been written by a modern day Tagore. 

Not to worry myself any more
if I am out of step, fallen behind.
Let the space probes continue;
I have a different distance to travel. 
Here I can watch the night sky,
listen to how one grass blade
grates on another as member 
of a disdained orchestra.

Another book of verse I will return to is William Carlos Williams's Paterson. 

It is dangerous to leave written that which is badly written. A chance word, upon paper, may destroy the world. Watch carefully and erase while the power is still yours, I say to myself, for all that is put down, once it escapes, may rot its way way into a thousand minds . . . 

                                                                  

Thursday 5 December 2019

Zen's 2019 Christmas Card


Please feel free to recycle this Christmas card. It comes from me to you with my best wishes.

May you all enjoy a happy and peaceful festive season.
       



           
Disclaimer:
                
Artist's note: any resemblance of Rudloph to Ms Thunberg is purely coincidental. 


Monday 2 December 2019

Brexit Wine Gums



"Produced in the EU outside Great Britain":

That's what's written in German on this Union Jack emblazoned  packet of Suntjens Wine Gums distributed by Suntjens Import + Export GmbH of Bruggen.

Despite all our tantrums and procrastinations someone in the EU still loves us!








It's not a Banksy


. . . but it's good isn't it? Only the walking sticks and the windows are real. 


Friday 29 November 2019

As Time Goes Buy?





On Black Friday, that is to say yesterday - reputedly the busiest shopping day of the year - my computer-linked Garmin Watch which I've owned and worn daily for only 8 months suddenly and for no apparent reason gave up the ghost.

Bizarre, or what?

Perhaps it's time to buy a new one?

In post-Snowden times odd goings-on in a world of electronic gadgets with so-called 'back doors' almost anything is possible.

It's a kind of magic.

Nothing should surprise us.















Wednesday 27 November 2019

Smileys In Vino Veritas?


I drew a squiggly line.  The computer interpreted it as one of the following: 



🌋🐛🏊🗻


I was invited to choose.

So I drew something else. A circle.

Now completely baffled.  It presented

me with the following:-☺️💡☔

Can computers do everything?  Given eons of time.   And clearer instructions.  Maybe they can.

Perhaps we are computers?

You and I may simply be characters in an advanced entity's computer game. Or - brains in jars - as

many earth people

have posited.

Quite often down at the pub.

In the steaming back yard urinal.

Gazing up at the moon and the stars.

Just before 'Last Orders, please!'











Thursday 21 November 2019

Logical Lingo



German, for me, is so logical it defies reason. It's not for nothing that English speakers have difficulty with it. Mark Twain famously said that German was impossible to learn. He added that his two favourite words from the language were damit and womit (pronounced like v).

A story in which a page 3 topless model was referred to variously as die (female) das (neutral ) and sein (male) in two or three lines was for me beyond the pale, so much so that I made a drawing to illustrate the point, and to confirm to myself that I haven't so far succumbed to linguistic madness.

In the newspaper Kate, as she is called, has purchased calendars for her friends. I've changed the story as I thought her fruit trees might in a humorous way help us to remember the points.







Friday 15 November 2019

Krems Caricature Museum - worth the smiles.




Peter Steiner, Manfred Deix and Bruno Haberzettel are three caricaturists whose works can be seen currently at the Caricature Museum in Krems. It's worth checking the railway timetables. November driving conditions are often not the best. I was glad I left the car at home. The quickest train from Vienna (Franz Josef Bhf) takes about one hour. The museum is in Stein, about 15 minutes walk from Krems Bhf.

Wednesday 13 November 2019

The Little Blue Freebie



Useful 'freebie'?

 A neat design I think.

Who can guess what it's for?




Answer below:















You slide it over the camera hole in the top of your computer to stop your computer spying on you.

An Orwellian freebie.

It's 1984.  

Have we come that far?  According to Mr Snowden we surely have.

Winter is at the door.

Snow is on the way.

Hope you find one under your Christmas tree.










Monday 11 November 2019

On 11 November tradition says we can cook our goose. Although we don't.


There are other things to think about on this St. Martins Day. I'm contemplating my artistic materials upstairs gathering dust. To draw or not to draw that is the question.  Perhaps a visit to the Bruno Haberzettl exhibition in the caricature museum at Krems is called for.

Are we Br'exit' or Bre'mane'?
Shurrup and eat your grass. 


Saturday 19 October 2019

Europa Three Years On


We've had the mail slot 
From GB. Today we're 
Waiting for the call . . . 






Saturday 12 October 2019

Great day for athletics and hopefully for the world


I was privileged to be able to be there and witness this amazing performance.

It was like a Roger Bannister moment.

42.2 kms in under 2 hours. For years they said it was impossible.

Eliud Kipchoge is the name to remember.

"A running world is a peaceful world and a happy world"  he said.

The time: 1 hour 59 minutes 40 seconds

The place: Vienna, Austria




Thursday 10 October 2019

Austria's Handke hooks Lit . prize


"Sorry, I can't read."
                            "That's a coincidence. Neither can I." 

        Special mention from the Nobel Prize Committee for the author's 2017 novel 'The Fruit Thief.'


Momently White


Freeze that frame!


Saturday 21 September 2019

Election


A useful addition to this post is The Loriot Principle (see Tassilo Wallentin in the sidebar). The text is in German but the translation button does an adequate job, and there is a great cartoon to see, for it sums up the situation very well indeed.




The front cover wrap of my Sunday newspaper is completely taken up with an advert showing the 6 party leaders (think career politicians) standing in the upcoming general election which is to be held next Sunday.

The advert is for 25% off furniture, bedding, curtains and carpets. The punch line is: Others (the politicians) can only dream of this percentage.

The election was called because of a political scandal which resulted in the government coalition falling and being replaced by an independent panel of experts.  As we move nearer to the election date more scandals come to light. The latest involves the Greens (their leader is the man in the dirty green vest).


The real front page (inside) show the struggle for power in a different light. The naked man is missing. He used to be the leader of the Greens. He now leads a party called Now.

I suppose that means now or never.

Tonight all, including the Now man, will be on TV in a live Q & A called an Elephant Round.

I imagine it's called Elephant Round because the participants have thick skins and blow their own trumpets.

Proceedings will probably begin calmly in an effort to show potential statesmanship and electability and deteriorate so that by the end they will be shouting, and on one case almost screaming,  over the top of each other.

The elephant with the most strident voice will be seen as the winner.

It won't affect the way people are going to vote.

No party will gain an overall majority.

A game of roulette involving the six colours will commence but nothing much is expected to happen until the Christmas shopping season is well underway and the public's mind is all jingle bells and good cheer and the Weltuntergang that only the six can save us all from hasn't happened  by then.










Thursday 19 September 2019

Driverless train out of control


Something I read the other day.

It was about a driverless computer controlled train on the Paris underground which went through three stations without stopping.

One can imagine the fear the passengers must have felt.

'The Taking of Pelham 123' is today's required reading.

Much to everyone's relief carnage was avoided when the runaway train narrowly avoided colliding with another train at one stage during its out of control journey.

When it comes to the current situation in the Middle East oil fields the French leader  Emmanel M seems determined to ignore the signals.

Angela M or Jean-Claude J should stop him before his mouth runs away with him.

But he won't listen.

Not to them or anybody else.

POTUS tried and failed.

It's clearly a job for THE HULK.

Yes he can!




Thursday 12 September 2019

On the Road with Boris . . .


Politics is all swings and roundabouts until . . . 

Of a sudden political wilderness beckons . . . 

Things ungood lurk in the shadows.

Boris, as we've come to expect, stands firm.

 Meanwhile I greet some friendly Austrians. Carpe Diem!


Tuesday 10 September 2019

EU New Broom Sweeps Clean



The old guard at the EU is being swiftly replaced. Old dogmas will soon be swept aside. The new EU ministers are from all points of the EU compass and are equally divided between the sexes.

The new EU will soon be a much better place than the old EU, the one Britain voted to leave.

The Brexit vote is irrelevant, behind the game.

Juncker is history.

Van der Leyen is the new woman in charge.

Things will now be different. Already, for example,  there are calls in Austria for English to become the official language of business.

An Austrian will hold the 's EU purse strings.


It's time to wake up and smell the roses.


Boris, you have a chance to redeem yourself.

There's now a way forward for non-Brexit Britain.

Forget the past.

Forget Juncker.

Forget the Merkel-Macron good cop - bad cop act.

Forget the backstop.

Bring back the 21.  And your brother.

Here's your big chance!

Adapt and survive.

Go for it.